She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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