But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
