I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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