ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
