Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
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I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
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Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
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