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• (515): View more from Iowa

  You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.

  (1-515): View more from Iowa

  Deal!

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.

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• (808): View more from Hawaii

  for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing

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• (713): View more from Texas

  His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.

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