Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?