He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
