At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Randomize