He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
this will be a night to untag.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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