Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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