smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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