wrigley field is MILF paradise
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
