Texts From Last Night

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  (480): View more from Arizona

  p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life

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  (480): p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life http://tfl.nu/eu21
  Replies (24) Good night (5062) Bad night (815)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night

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  (614): So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night http://tfl.nu/bxgc
  Replies (13) Good night (6646) Bad night (738)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man

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  (512): he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man http://tfl.nu/37r4
  Replies (21) Good night (5339) Bad night (975)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast

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  (306): coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast http://tfl.nu/g654
  Replies (19) Good night (5154) Bad night (1086)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.

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  (931): drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes. http://tfl.nu/1e3m
  Replies (27) Good night (6558) Bad night (1460)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.

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  (504): Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself. http://tfl.nu/n9ey
  Replies (9) Good night (1102) Bad night (2941)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  i flashed his best friends last night

  (1-416): View more from Toronto

  you always were good at making good first impressions

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  (416): i flashed his best friends last night (1-416): you always were good at making good first impressions http://tfl.nu/b564
  Replies (10) Good night (3928) Bad night (1519)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.

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  (904): my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower. http://tfl.nu/bnhm
  Replies (10) Good night (3897) Bad night (1185)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I feel awful

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  Physically or morally

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.

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  (513): I feel awful (1-513): Physically or morally (513): Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances. http://tfl.nu/3wvv
  Replies (10) Good night (2701) Bad night (821)
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  (408): View more from California

  sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.

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  (408): sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here. http://tfl.nu/d4g6
  Replies (17) Good night (2507) Bad night (814)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?

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  (434): On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am? http://tfl.nu/gml1
  Replies (5) Good night (1121) Bad night (695)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape

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  (250): im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape http://tfl.nu/bk86
  Replies (1) Good night (866) Bad night (1050)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.

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  (319): She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high. http://tfl.nu/fsls
  Replies (6) Good night (1131) Bad night (825)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course

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  (239): Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course http://tfl.nu/4x8m
  Replies (2) Good night (745) Bad night (398)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.

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  (309): I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong. http://tfl.nu/mdfo
  Replies (1) Good night (588) Bad night (321)

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