Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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