a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
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I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
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If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
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