OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
