I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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