"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
