I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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