We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
