**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
BRING THE BAGELS
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
