Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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