i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
