I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize