why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize