Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
