im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
