: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Tell her she can't have a vagina
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Randomize
