I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
When did angry sex become our thing?
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
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