i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize