You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Randomize