So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
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