do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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