ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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