it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
