I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
