Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
