You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
