He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
