don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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