i need an iv and a liver transplant
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize