is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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