At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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