I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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