Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm experimenting with sincerity
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
