i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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