problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Watching her eat just hurts me
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
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