that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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