I just cut my nipple shaving
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize