Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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