Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
