no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
