Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
